I embraced turning 40. I felt stronger, happier, more content in my own skin than I had at any other point in my life. My marriage was strong, my friendships established. I had accepted my flaws and my pants size… Well, maybe not “accepted” my pants size. But I definitely worried about it much less […]
Have We Traded Empathy for Efficiency?
Standing in the doorway to my garage on Christmas Eve was like staring into the aisles of Toys R Us. To a casual observer, we were an episode of ‘Hoarders’ waiting to happen. 10 minutes later I sat crossed-legged on the family room floor, covered in layers of wrapping paper and bits of ribbon, staring […]
Time For Bed: A Monologue
Time for bed! I said, time for bed! I’m sorry you don’t want to, but it’s time. Please put your shoes and socks where they belong. Both shoes. All the socks. Well, they certainly aren’t mine. Go brush your teeth. Leave your brother alone. Don’t forget toothpaste. Stop touching your brother. Brush your teeth! […]
Did you ever think we’d get here, Mom?
Most of us don’t want to admit that our mothers were right. In fact, there are some who would do anything to avoid admitting it. I’m not one of those people. My mom was right in so many ways. Today on The Mid I’m talking about the complicated and beautiful relationship I had with my […]
That one time I stood on a stage in front of people…
As a “writer” I find myself answering the same 3 questions. 1. Where do you get your ideas? 2. What’s your writing process? 3. What are you goals? ~The first question is an easy one to answer: Have you met my kids or my dog? These posts just write themselves! The truth is, […]
As Long as ‘No’ Means No When it Matters Most
5 “Make sure you’re not too close to the couch.” I shimmied my way over a few more inches. 4 “I hope you’re ready. It’s almost time.” 3 Eyes clenched. Belly muscles taut with anticipation. 2 1 ¾ 1 ½ 1 Avalanche!! Suddenly I’m buried beneath the weight of bed pillows, comforters, couch cushions, and […]
9 Things I Wish The Internet Would Stop Telling Me To Do
Public Service Announcement: If you find yourself in the middle of a psychology experiment during which a “teacher” instructs me to shock you with increasing voltage every time you answer a question incorrectly, hold on tight ’cause chances are it’s about to get hot in here. To date, I have the utmost respect for anyone […]
Dear Spike, You’re still an a%#hole
Dear Spike, I like to think I’m a pretty forgiving person. I believe in second chances and clean slates, do overs and fresh starts. It is because of this gracious spirit, that I will not be discussing any of your past transgressions, Spike. I will not mention… escaping out the second story window landing […]
How to Parent Without Using Words
Men speak approximately 7,000 words per day.* Women speak approximately 20,000 words per day.* Mothers speak 2,846,325 words per day… ** and most of them are the same phrases repeated over and over and over. Put your backpack away pick up your shoes make your bed brush your teeth stop touching your brother don’t […]
Where’s Your Line in the Sand?
My parenting stinks of hypocrisy. Maybe ‘hypocrisy’ is too strong of a word. There’s an implication of intentional insincerity or false representation when someone acts like a hypocrite. Perhaps ‘inconsistent’ is a more accurate description of my parenting. There’s no intentional trickery in who I claim to be as a parent or how I parent […]
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