|I pity the fool who doesn’t love his mutha!|
The interwebs are full of talk about Mother’s Day this week. I hadn’t planned on joining in the conversation. Personally, I find M Day tough to navigate.
First of all, there are 3 generations of mothers in my family. Both of my grandmothers will be turning 95 in the next few months and live approximately 25 minutes away. My own mother also lives in town. Toss in two sisters in law and their mothers, sisters and aunts and grandmas (all living within a 20 mile radius) and that’s a lot of mothers to juggle.
It goes a little something like this: My husband wants to serve me. I want to serve my mother. My mother wants to serve her mother and her daughter/daughters in law who in turn want to serve their mothers and grandmothers and aunts and sisters in law. It’s like servant overload!
Then there’s a whole ‘nother layer I find hard to talk about. You see, every year The Hubs approaches me in the beginning of May with the following question:
“Babe, what would you like to do for Mother’s Day?”
It seems like an innocent question. And could he be more sweet for wanting to make my day special? But it really isn’t an innocent question because I just can’t bring myself to answer honestly. Know why? Because what kind of gigantic a-hole would I be if admitted that the thing I want for Mother’s Day is to not be a mother for just one day?
Before you tar and feather me. Know this: I love being a Mom. More importantly, I love being a mom to my awesome kids. They are amazing and funny and make me a better person than I could ever be on my own. What I mean is that I don’t want to do any of the things that go along with being a mom.
For one day I don’t want to think about what anyone is wearing. I don’t want to remind them to bring a jacket (then spend 15 minutes trying to find the jacket) or casually suggest shorts because a beenie and snow jacket might be cute but not appropriate on a Spring day in Southern California. I don’t want to make anyone a meal. Better yet, I don’t want to think at all about what my kids are eating. I don’t want to think about sugar, or fiber or what they already ate or will eat later. And I certainly don’t want to clean it up. I don’t want to tell anyone to leave their brother alone or to keep their hands to themselves or to use kind words. I don’t want to make sure teeth have been adequately brushed, faces have been washed, beds have been made, buns have been wiped, toilets have been flushed, backpacks have been put away or whether or not the dog has been fed. For one day, I want to be responsible for no one. And if I’m going to be totally and completely honest: I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.
And I decided this is the year I’m going to make that happen. I can actually thank my own mom for that. She called last week to tell me she and my dad were going to Palm Springs for the weekend. “Everyone is on their own this year.” Hallelujah!!
So here’s how it went down in our house:
The Hubs: What do you want to do for Mother’s Day?
Me: I would like to make no decisions and manage no one from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed. I don’t want to decide what anyone wears, what they eat, where they go. Not even me. I want to simply be lead around all day at the mercy of everyone else’s decisions.
The Hubs: You got it.
I shared this last night on Facebook and several people said they would not like to spend the day at the mercy of everyone else. It dawned on me that I needed to make sure I was clear about what I meant. So The Hubs and revisited the conversation again this morning.
Me: I just want to clarify my request for Mother’s Day.
The Hubs: You don’t want to think at all. How much clearer can you be?
Me: I want to make sure you understand that when I say “I want you guys to make all the decisions about how I spend the day,” I meant I want all your decisions to be based on what you know about ME. I don’t want to spend the day doing what you guys want to do.
The Hubs: Do you really think I’m an idiot?
Me: Of course not! (OK, maybe a little bit.)
At this point, it’s out of my hands. Personally, I know The Hubs will knock it out of the park. You see, his love language is gift giving and the man gives the BEST gifts ever- from my first iPhone to a gift card to a spa for me AND a friend because he knows that an entire day spent alone anywhere is like death to me. Now that’s a good man who knows his woman!
So my wish for you on this Mother’s Day is that you get exactly what YOU want- whether it’s a day riding bikes with your family, burnt toast in bed made by your sweet cherubs, an entire UNINTERRUPTED day spent snuggled in your bed watching Chick Flicks or a Girl’s Day with your BFFs and some margaritas. Because let’s be honest, ladies- we love being moms, but it’s pretty great to have one day off;)
HOWEVER! Before you head off to spend your perfect Mother’s Day, you MUST visit my fab bloggy friend Mom Rants and Comfy Pants. This kick ass Mom wrote a rap for moms everywhere! And if that wasn’t awesome enough… She made a video for it!! So go here NOW!
|I told you to visit Mom Rants and Comfy Pants!|
Happy Mother’s Day!
That’s just my normal.